By Debbie Frolke

A tradition is the practice of handing down a story, belief, or custom from one generation to the next in order to establish and to reinforce a strong sense of identity. This is the case in most families whether they actually recognize it or not. However, each family goes through seasons. There is a "season" when the family has babies and young children. There’s another season when kids might be in elementary school, then a season of adolescence, and then high school and then college.

A wise parent considers the family season in planning traditions. Certain traditions are effective for seasons and not for others. Just as the wise writer of Ecclesiastes said, "There is a time to embrace and time to refrain from embracing," sometimes a hug speaks more clearly than a lecture. However, as children grow up, it may not be "cool" to hug Mom or Grandma in public places, but don’t let that stop you from hugging while in your home or theirs.

Sometimes time alone is more helpful than time together. God has made everything beautiful for its own time. The key is to discover what God wants to do in the season of your family’s life. From three special books I have read recently and from my own experience, I know that families who laugh and enjoy being together do have stronger and healthier relationships. The happiest families are those who enjoy common activities, support one another in their endeavors, share a good sense of humor, and respect when someone wants "alone" time. Happy families have discovered creative ways to include fun and festivities in their family lives.

Remember, not everything needs to be spiritual or a teachable moment, some things are just for fun! Some moments are just for memories and not instruction. There IS room for merriment in all of life’s cycles. Family fun increases the overall health of a family unit.

Figure out ways to play with your kids and grandkids. Take time for fun because it is fun! Do you remember even one lecture your parents gave you? Or do you, like I do, remember the times your parents played with you? And the times your parents were there for you while you were in a play or participated in sports? Most people remember the fun times. You don’t have to wait for birthdays, Thanksgiving or Christmas for celebrations. Some fun can put a celebration in even the most ordinary of days. Make each day a celebration of life!

In playing organized games with your children or grandchildren, you are not only showing them that you enjoy spending time together but also that it’s good to learn to follow rules, compete, concentrate, work as a team, strategize and handle defeat. Playing games as a family is not a waste of time but rather preparing kids for life. My dad was known for being a checker player who was really tough to beat. When I was little I remember beating him one time. He was astounded, yet pleased. I remember hearing Mom say, "I guess she’s just a chip off the old block." And I guess I am, for recently a neighbor of ours saw me in a store and said: "You have that same beautiful friendly smile as your Dad had. He was so nice to everyone. I used to work for him and we always ended up laughing about something." What a legacy, to teach your children to be friendly, to smile at others and to laugh! How simple, yet how rare, Thanks, Dad, for teaching me that.

Another wonderful gift to pass on to our children is the gift of prayer and faith. My newest granddaughter, Samantha, age 4, recently prayed for a kitten to be returned. It had been gone for a week. The next day, the kitten did return. My grandson Ben asked his mom if he could pray for her because she wasn’t feeling well. He placed his hands on her back and prayed for her. She felt better the next day.

As we look forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas, I invite you to remember to teach your children and grandchildren the value of prayers and thankfulness. As your already busy schedule increases with holiday preparations, take time to just be together, to laugh and to love. We are never promised tomorrow so make the most of today.

Until next time, delight yourself in the Lord and in your grandchildren.